my wallet hast been saveth by thine find so recent.
ahem!
wandering back home, saturday (about two weeks ago), we pass the laundromat on osborne. And lying beside the building, against the wall, was a backpack. and it was propped up, but at the same time still kinda "hidden". But it wasnt hidden. Because we were walking on the sidewalk and it caught both of our eyes. perhaps the individual that hid this bag was drunk..? Or near-sighted...
it feels full of stuff...! I am giggling (not maniacally - don't worry) at the thought of opening it to find random goodies. Life is good. Especially that Saturday night.
At home, opened, we discover the beautiful and extremely valuable treasures.
A half of a 26 of Vodka (some alberta-hairspray-flavoured one).
A full box of empty cigarette tubes.
And one very full, very unopened tin of tobacco.
Well! If thats not worth a riverdance, then I dont know what is.! (you guys are so damn hard to please)

My computer? Well my computer sucks monkey b.... - - .......errr.. well YOU know.

mastering the waiting game

*frustrated noise*
And follow that by an extreme sigh.
That is the sound of CJ at this hour on this date.
The equivalent to a jolly "Bah Humbug.."

Okay, so this has been bugging me lately. So I feel as though (looking back), like I have been a gernally happy person. Essentially, I was easy-going and too optimistic to be considered healthy... Y'know, grand ol' stuff like that. But lately?? Lately I feel like I am just so pissed off. I am sicccck of my life and all the complications right now. I have been intensely apartment hunting for what feels like way too long. I hate the amount of money I have to live off of - which could easily be changed. (Job hunting, I'd like to introduce myself...) I just do not feel content enough. The other day I was in this fantastic mood. It was, well.. fantastic. And I really fucking miss the days when that was all I would feel. And it was damn contagious. And everything worked itself out. I want to go to school. I want to be able to say where I see myself in five years... ten years... or at least give a rough estimate. I feel like I am clouded by uncertainty. Even though I know its foolish, I would much rather be able to flip that damn switch and takes me up on the opportunity to wind up and slap me across the face (figuratively or metaphorically - no difference)... so I can open my fucking eyes and actually see the solution to the maze, like how I used to, or how everybody else can.
I just needed to rant a bit. Don't want to burden anyone with this crap. Its all just nonsense, anyways..right? It is all just in my head, and really... well.. shouldnt a few well chosen words and relevant cliches be able to fix this little issue anyways? I need some inspiration. My art is also suffering, and I wish this wasn't the case.

Anywho, that felt a bit better. to exhale all this onto here. Don't worry, I'll be much more fun to read about soon enough. Justwaiting for said well chosen words and relevant cliches. Anytime now.....

b to thee itches

eleven alarms.
i just counted.
thats the amount it took us to finally roll our butts out of bed this morning. it is not like this day was incredibly important in comparison to any other weekday. its just an attempt to start doing a backflip in terms of changing the way things are running in my life.
*note to self: find sketchbook, which has prescription in it, which needs to be filled*

this girl needs a haircut - really bad.
although hast recently been saveth'd by a really sweet dumpstered hat that I've always wanted. hurraaah!

wish I had more to ramble about. altho that will come soon enough.
until then, happy thursday, bitches.

sincerly, that guy

"Dearest Cjay,


it has been another period of time passed, and still you let the same issues with the same name and the same face keep poking itself in your business. Not to mention, you let it get to your head. And not in the "Full House"-sorta-way where you learn that very important lesson and then everything gets worked out to your advantage and nothing is left in dis-array by the end of the half hour time slot.


maybe this is me writing you a letter of self-awakening via me, and consider this your realization that you should let it get that way...?


//next_point:: also, can you stop so obviously censoring your blog? it is of great annoyance, plus it's really obvious. did I mention how annoyingly obvious you are? I liked when your words and other words were not, in fact, so cryptic to the point of exhaustion. laaaaaaame. 


ever since you started dating Lauren, it has been a slow downhill glide away from the blatantly honest and free-speaking ceej we all once read the words of wisdom from. she's great, but just because you think that she might read your blog sometimes, does not mean that us, your great and mighty blog readers (that can make, as well as break.. aka shatter.. you), should suffer! I demand a refund. Or a re-un-censorship.  Stop giving a fuck, once again.


Also. More kitty pictures.
Sincerly, that guy"

the masses have spoken. and in great depth. and by masses i mean, that guy there.

Yes, so maybe this is what we do when given a Wednesday night and Youtube.

Names: Brother & Sister. No last name. Kinda like Cher, Or that guy that used to call himself Prince. Or the receptionist at the walk-in I go to... whos plan it was to replace her name with a symbol of a uterus.

meet my sister. she's showing off her cleavage, everybody. by the way.

my nephew.
who is, both black, and a muffin.

-censored before 6pm-

sitting quaintly off to the side, at a table for two, the keys of a laptop placed underneath my fingertips. last night the Gods of Dumpstering, reached down from their heavens of hoarding, and a light shone. And lead me through the process of getting my numerous lights (flashlights and YES a headlamp.
three suitcases full of goods - including a computer tower, a ps2, and  a laptop. Also, two winterjackets for yours truly,
my eyes are closing. i am going to start going home.
you will hear from me again. and nxt time - no censoring myself. it goes against what I entirely stand for,