/Dear toonie-lady,
Stop it. Do you just sit somewhere beneath my apartment, to beg for money? The way you go about it, is the worst and most annoying attempt for my spare change, ever.
"My toonie! My toonie! O, somebody help meeee...."
I have been hearing that every few days (at least). And it honestly does not sound like you are crying. Think of a better story. Or perhaps just tell people the truth. Or surprise me and actually start collecting toonies. Thanks for your time.
/Sincerly, me.